day two.

Fear.

Its such a big word I might say.
Theres so many things a person can fear.
I'm not one of those people who are constantly worried and scarred you know. but we all have are moments.
You know whats scary? To think about the future. To think about all the endless things that could happen. I'm only 16, but yeah.. I worry about it a lot! I plan a lot. I get mad when things don't go according to plan too. No does not mean I don't like to be spontaneous.. because trust me. I do.
You cant know what the future is going to be like.. you can only know whats in this moment, that will make the future different.
What I think of a perfect future? of course every girl dreams about her life.. her marriage, kids, ect. and don't think i'm any different from that right there. except I know nothing is perfect and I don't go into such detail.. I just know what I would like.:I would like to get married to somebody who understands me and loves me for all that I am. I want kids.. but not for a long time. talk about fear. there you go. I want to travel, I love to travel. I love to be outdoors. I want to be able to enjoy life, I want to be able to move to North Carolina.. Its so pretty out there. Like. Unbelievable. and I want to live till I'm old with my love.
Is that to much to want? I mean every girl can dream. I fear that its not going to happen.
I worry all the time for some reason about my own life ending suddenly.. before I have the chance to live it. Is anybody else the same way? or losing somebody close like family, friends. ect.
fear is always here, and it does not go away

Fear